Confessions of a Joe Rogan Fanboy
Hi, I’m Mike. It has been 64 days since my last Joe Rogan. I’m standing here before you today, because I know you, I know where you’ve been, and I can say that there is hope. I can see it in your faces: you’re thinking, this guy doesn’t know shit, he has no idea of the depths of despair I have been through trying to kick Joe Rogan. Friends, let me share my story.
It all started a couple of years ago when my wife went to visit her mother for a week. I was alone in the house, unemployed, and drinking heavily. I thought, Woo hoo, vacation time! I was sitting in the kitchen drinking beer one morning, flipping through Youtube, when something caught my eye. A show called The Joe Rogan Experience. It was called a “podcast.” I remembered Joe Rogan’s face from the television show, News Radio, so I clicked on it. Joe Rogan’s latest guest was a guy who had lived in the Alaska wilderness all alone for a year. Holy shit! I pressed “play” on my phone and sat there drinking and listening for 3 hours, not realizing my life would never be the same.
There were several hundred backlogged Joe Rogan shows. For a week I jumped out of bed, went to the store, bought beer and listened to 3 or 4 Joe Rogans all day. When my wife would text me from her mother’s, I would get annoyed that she interrupted Joe Rogan. Joe Rogan was like sweet nectar flooding my insides. I thought, Where has…